Prior to heading to Oktoberfest in my hometown of La Mesa, California last weekend, Cousin Phil asked if he could pen a guest post for gas•tron•o•my about the event’s food and fun. My answer? Absolutely. As you shall read, there ain’t no shenanigans like Cousin Phil shenanigans.
Oktoberfest in La Mesa is touted as the “Largest Oktoberfest west of the Mississippi.” I don’t know about any of that, but what I do know is that it’s a weekend filled with lots of eats, lots of booze and lots of good times.
Since Oktoberfest takes place just a stones throw away from my apartment, I was delighted when Cousin Cathy agreed to let me write a guest blog about all the haps this year. Here’s what transpired.
Friday—I got off work at three because I had a dentist appointment. By the time I got home, my girlfriend Tannia was anxious and ready to rock. She didn’t even seem to care that the Dragon Lady at La Mesa Dental (who may or may not be playing a prominent role in the upcoming Saw V movie) tore up my gums. It’s called a teeth cleaning not a gum gouging, lady! In any matter, we headed down the street and got an outside table at Por Favor, a Mexican restaurant on the corner of La Mesa Boulevard and Palm Ave, right smack dab in the middle of the action.
We had a couple of drinks—Makers Mark and Coke for me, margarita for Tannia—and got hungry soon after. True to form, I went over to the Chinese food stand and ordered a combo plate which consisted of fried rice, noodles, an egg roll and a meat on a stick. To round things out, I also got a chicken on a stick. Tannia, also true to form, stuck with Mexican food and ordered the Bontana San Lucas, which are mini rolled tacos topped with guacamole, sour cream and lettuce and served with a side of beans.
I was disappointed by the flavorless fried rice and egg roll, and the meat on a stick was overcooked. However, I thoroughly enjoyed the noodles and chicken on a stick. After I finished my platter, I dove into the Bontana San Lucas, which never disappoints. The meat-stuffed rolled tacos filled me up and provided my gut with the right amount of grease to keep the Boozetrain going. Afterwards, we were joined by Cousin Jimmy, the conductor of the Boozetrain.
By the time night fell onto La Mesa, the streets were packed with people. Usually when Tannia and I drink outside of Por Favor we’re lucky to see six people the whole evening, but this night was different. Throngs of people were walking up and down La Mesa Boulevard, occasionally stopping to check out vendor booths lined up and down and in the center of the street. It was surreal. We waved and said hi to people we usually only see at the gym or the grocery store—and most of the time ignore. It was a festive atmosphere.
Later, we saw Jimmy’s parents walking down the street, and they were elated to join us at our prime spot for some food and drinks. Jimmy’s dad started off with a Negra Modelo and his mom had a virgin strawberry margarita. For eats, they split a bratwurst (standard Oktoberfest fare) and a carne asada burrito (standard San Diego fare).
As the booze continued to flow, our appetites continued to grow. Jimmy treated his parents to corn on the cob and popcorn from a nearby stand, while I ordered some carne asada nachos for the table. We ate, drank, talked, laughed and people watched.
The madness reached a tipping point when we were joined by friends Scot, Kelly, Walt and Walt’s buddy. Jimmy’s parents eventually went home, but the madness continued. The initial plan was to have a couple of drinks and then head over to the beer garden, but the word on the street was that the line to get in wrapped around the block so we decided to just stay put and get drunk. We ordered shots of Jagermeister and I went across the street to get Monster so we could make Jager-bombs.
After a while, we decided a change of scenery was in order so we walked a few doors down to Hoppers, a new cigar / beer joint. Living in La Mesa for the past few years, I’m more than used to dive bars. Nonetheless, I was thrilled when I saw that Hoffers was clean and offered a bunch of beers on tap, including ones that I’d never even heard of. Also, the floors weren’t sticky, the bar stools were intact and they had a number of plasma TVs. Heck, it didn’t even have that ‘mix of stale beer and urine’ smell. What a concept! We drank some beers until last call and Scot, Jimmy and I smoked some cigars. Afterward, I ordered Tannia a pizza from Woodstock and we headed home where she ate her pizza and I had a bowl of mi xui cao.
The night was over, but like Shangri-La beneath the summer moon, we would return again.
Saturday—I woke up and had some mi sate for breakfast and washed it down with a Heineken. After my haircut appointment, I received a text message from Cousin Jimmy saying he was drinking at Por Favor (I told you he was the conductor of the Boozetrain). Around noon, Tannia and I found ourselves sitting at the bar at Por Favor having drinks—she had a Bloody Mary, I had to settle for a Crown Royal and Coke since evidently we drank all the Makers Mark the night before. I’m not kidding.
After some drinks, Tannia and I hit the shopping vendors, while Jimmy ate a bratwurst and a tri-tip sandwich. He found the tri-tip sandwich merely average—the slices of meat were bland and chewy. The brat, on the other hand, was good even though he was hoping for more spice.
Now seems like a good time to explain that Oktoberfest La Mesa gives you the option of Bratwurst, Polish Sausage, and Hot Link. In case there’s any doubt, you always go with the Bratwurst. You can get Polish Sausage and Hot Links at any Costco (or supermarket for that matter) and they both taste like hotdogs —and look like hotdogs on steroids. A good Bratwurst, on the other hand, is a little more difficult to find and definitely tastier than your garden variety hotdog or spicy hotdog on steroids. So if you’re ever down at Oktoberfest and end up being the sucker who ordered the polish sausage or hotlink, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Oktoberfest during the day is a difference experience than Oktoberfest at night. The streets weren’t nearly as crowded and there were more families and kids as opposed to a bunch of drunk people walking around. The weather was nice. Sunshine was mixed in with intermittent clouds, making it cool enough to walk around without being drenched in sweat because of the heat or humidity.
Somewhere in between all of this we went into Hoffers again, met up with Jimmy again, drank some beers (again) and got a couple of cigars to smoke (again). Good times.
After Hoffers we continued our troll. Highlights of the afternoon included going down a slide and finding glasses that looked exactly like the ones Zack, Slater and Screech wore when they had a slumber party at Screech’s house and sang Bar-Bar-Bar, Bar-Bar-Barbra Ann …
We hit the wall around six while having drinks and french fries at Johnny B’s, a nearby burger joint. I was exhausted! We decided to go home and take a nap for a couple of hours before heading out again. Instead, we didn’t wake up until 10. Game over.
